poor little guy

ever since landon was born, he hasn't been well a day in his life. this crouping, stressed cough along with labored breathing follow him everyday. when he was born, he was in distress while i was pushing. he came out and there was a flood of doctors and nurses in the room. he wasn't breathing well and his heart beat was irratic. it wasn't the moment mothers dream of when they have their babies. i got to hold him for only a minute before he was taken to the level 2 nursery. when we got to see him, he was hooked up to breathing tubes and ivs. we couldn't even hold him without getting tangled up in cords. now, over a year later, the poor kid is still having to endure poking and proding to find out what is wrong with him. instead of sleeping in today, basking in the joy of christmas that was yesterday, landon and i had to get up at six in the morning and drive an hour to Phoenix children's hospital. worst part was, landon couldn't eat anything for at least three hours before we went, not even milk. he didn't wake up well and i was dreading the morning to come. we had to go to the hospital so they could could do an upper g.i. scope. he had to drink a barium solution and the radiologists had to watch it go down his esophagus and into his digestive track. they were looking for a collapse or impression in his esophagus that could be contributing to what they call the "stridor", which is the sound that he makes when he coughs. looking it on the internet, i found that it is a noisy, high pitched sound that may suggest some sort of infection or obstruction in the breathing airways. it's a symptom of something else, not a disease in itself. he was well behaved and going to the children's hopsital is always better than the regular hospital. they watched him digest the solution and looked for any problems. the radiologist said that this is usually the test done first to rule out anything gi wise. he said he didn't see anything but will give the results to the doctor to use in combination with the next test he has to get done.
from here, landon has to have a brochoscope done. he has to have a rigid scope done, so he'll be put under anthesia for the procedure. they are doing this form so that if they need to biospy any tissue or correct a narrowed, collapsed or damaged airway, they can. this hasn't been scheduled yet but should be happening in the next week or so. i'm going to be there for him...and for myself. i've been waiting for someone to give me an answer to his problems his whole life. it keeps getting pushed back on a cold, or allergies, or congestion, or "it's going around". we recently found out that a pediatrician diagnosed landon with a chronic disorder called reactive respiratory disorder back in february, but never told us about it. i found about it when i called to get copies of his record sent to my work. this disease is very confusing becasuse some doctors say it must not be confused with asthema and some websites say they are one of the same. regardless of what it is, that isn't what the pulmonologist has told us. so we're going to put landon through the poking and proding and sedation to find something!! hopefully, it is nothing too seirous like a defect in his airways or a tumor or anything else scary you read about on the internet and the doctors list as the "worst case scenarios for this situation".

so my poor little guy. i just want him to have an answer and ultimately, a solution.